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Credits & Stuff

Hideous Creatures was recorded at Griffin Audio Media in Grayslake, IL. Engineered by John Griffin, mixed by Frankenpony, and Kyle Johnson was again master of his domain.

John Griffin wrote hood, showing, and immersing. Rick wrote the rest, although it was John's idea to write apologizing. Rick also wrote the string quartet part in hood. As usual, arrangement credit goes to the whole band.

Organ donation on come down by Rick Cinquemani. Effected Swissy speak on nature vs. nurture by Ginger Hobi-Ragaz (because that's mandatory on a Frankenpony CD). Screams on immersing by Emily Bergadon, Cory Flynn, Katie Niebur, Jon Griffin (that's Jon, not John!), and Andrea Leigh Merriot.

Tara Griffin took the spooky plastic baby photo featured on the cover. Johnny Flamini went back in time to take the dinosaur photo featured on the back, and he coordinated the art and replication process. Kate Campbell expertly created the graphics.



Lyrics

Since we didn't include the lyrics with the CD, they are available here in a better PDF format for printing or saving. If you don't have a PDF Reader, we suggest a Google search on Adobe Reader. Or get a Macintosh. Then again, we're just a band - not your computer support. What the hell do we know?

trash

he's married, but he still likes dating
and she's left her small kids home alone so she can go out to play
and so they both are searching for someone new to squeeze
without regard for STDs

white trash, you trash, one trash, two trash
you trash me like on reality TV trash
it's so hard to see the carnage when you're buried in the garbage

hey-hey-hey, you-you-you, mister-mister-mister

he's mr. hockey dad, and he can't stop screaming
the veins in his neck are bulging and thick
his venom is streaming
and so the coach, the referee, and his son are in his aim
of those he's threatening to maim

this song is not about mobile homes, mullets, or money
though from a certain view, life can look tragically funny
but we can't let the trash pile up forever
isn't it time that we all got our shit together?

white trash, you trash, one trash, two trash
old trash, new trash, red trash, blue trash
poor trash, rich trash, mean ol' bitch trash
violent guy trash, piling high trash
it's so hard to see the carnage when you're buried in the garbage

evolution

has evolution brought us now to here?
sitting on this worn out couch
drinking cheap domestic luke-warm beer
yes our thumbs they are opposable
and our beer cans are disposable

the modern brain can make stupid decisions
we can choose to hate someone based upon their race and/or religion
comparatively was the caveman oh so dumb
with his protruding occipital bun?

it's the progress of the species
plodding through the feces
standing way more upright
feeling way more uptight
should i laugh or maybe should i cry?
are we still the fittest to survive?

has evolution brought us to this place?
got to see a plastic surgeon
get my perfect body and/or face
look me over and i'm sure you'll find
evolution hasn't treated me so kind

hood

look around my throat there
see the blisters form where tightly he had a little piece of me

you see my hands are tied up
i couldn't lie and stand up
forcefully he would take control of me

you walk the earth like we do
that's not fair amigo
you deserve the lion's share
humiliation people stare

we cart around these feelings
i guess it just must be

i am sorry if i'm out of line here
not too often do i act so crass
pardon me but your hood is showing
i'd like to shove that hood up your ass

you think you caught me laughing
that is right you saw me wishing things, terrible things on you

i think my mind is made up
take a hint and fade out
naturally just go away
please don't waste another day

nature vs. nurture

if nature is the issue then let me imagine
your great grand-daddy drowned puppies just to have fun
your grandma on the other side had many-a-special trait
she often stole money from the church collection plate
and now you are who you are it was nothing less than your fate

was it nature?
was it nurture?
could you evolve in the future?

if nurture is the issue then i'll fill in the rest
your mama didn't love you she said you were just a pest
your daddy taught you fighting just stay undetectable
and when he isn't looking kick him in the testicles
and that is how it went
a product of your environment

showing

i don't want to show what i am hiding just you wait and see
i just need to see what you are hiding quite naturally

you go first and then i'll make my decision - unilaterally
because the next time you see me i'll be turning red
it sheds a terrible light on me

i think its time to see what i am missing
i'll be waiting here
i'm not feeling reciprocation aimed at me dear

take a shot it'll last a little longer - obviously
because the next time you see me i'll be hanging out
literally and metaphorically

show me yours i'll show you mine right now
show me yours i'll show you how right now
show me yours i'll show you mine right now

now i've gone and said it and i can't take it back forget it
and i'll never have that recipe again

apologizing

we're sorry about that last song
we realize that we were wrong
we know that we were idiots
you shouldn't have to show your tickets to those double features
we're not hideous creatures
we just thought we should get to know each other so much better
i don't know this probably isn't helping...

obsessing

you didn't call me back...
i'm obsessing again

you didn't say you love me...
i'm obsessing again

this song is much too repetitive...
i'm obsessing again

i'm obsessing again 'cause i can't have you
you don't love me
how could you not love me?
i'm so lovable

i'm obsessing again 'cause i can't have you
you don't want me
how could you not want me?
i'm so want-able

medicating

i am off my medications
with severe hallucinations
interpreting the Book of Revelation
let me tell you what i see

capitalists, robber barons in our midst
chocolate frogs and Lincoln logs are crushed beneath their giant fists
sitting on the can
worried about the hand that could pull me down from far below
to some place i know i don't want to go

elephants wearing ties with floral prints
accumulate, accumulate and wallow in their crapulence
makes no sense
the future spoken in past tense
calling me from a brave new year
feeding me new things to fear

i'm back on my medications
it never was hallucinations
only acid reflux and frustration
side effects may include headache and flatulation
ask your doctor if it might be right for you

rotting

in the winter of my discombobulation
i smelled just a hint of decay and stink mutation
to find the source would be the start of my investigation

i searched, i searched, i searched but much to my chagrin
it seemed to follow me like it was on my skin
i finally realized the stink was coming from within

i am rotting from the inside-out
it's pretty slow and yet i haven't got a doubt
as sure as the shine on my bald head
i'll end up dead
just the facts
i've got about 50-60 years MAX

my body is a wonderland
crazy hairs grow from my ears, my back, and in my nose
but what you have to understand
we are all just bananas, and i am getting riper i suppose

if the stink had only come from the trash or lavatory
i don't think that would have been much of a good story
hate to leave you without metaphors if not allegory

immersing

drop those bombs making sure you hit the middle
don't walk that line unless you know who you cripple
complete your mission just forget about the people
someone get a clue point him in the right direction

withstand the plan you hope we're all behind you
with hand in hand we'll walk right with you

wake up take a look can't you see the writing
on the wall, off the wall, he believes he is mighty
you tell me 'bout his triumph you don't mind if i'm not biting
replace him or let's trace him on the concrete where he's lying

take a minute for the average man while immersing in yourself
what would it take for a change to be made?
stop immersing in yourself
i hate to drag you from the mirror again
stop immersing in yourself, in yourself

come down

i know that you're down and i feel your pain
i know that you're partly if not mostly insane
but i'm not here to judge you

i've been there like you
way out on the edge
that's metaphorically speaking
i've never literally been out on the ledge
but this isn't about me

why don't you come down, come down from the ledge
things will look much better you will find
come down, come down from the ledge
think of all the things you'd leave behind

like cookies and pizza
things that you love the mostest
and all the cream filling in those products from Hostess
or maybe you like Little Debbie?

and what about sex, both with and without a partner?
and what about your velvet Elvis and other fine art, sir?
and what about guitar leads?

and just one more thing at the top of the list, too
please think of us, cause we would miss you

the importance of eating breakfast

violence begets violence
and violins beget cellos
power leads to tyrants, and horses lead to jello
an orgasm is something i can't fake
which leads me to the point i'm trying to make

it's the importance of eating breakfast
you haven't eaten since before your long rest

and you will find you feel your best
and you will then feel truly blessed
and you'll be having so much fun
and you will stay forever young

pay attention this will be on the test
it's all about the importance of eating breakfast

i think i'll wear a dress today, just like J. Edgar Hoover
if we keep declaring war, i'm moving to Vancouver
useless tragedy i just can't take
which leads me to the point i'm trying to make

i'll be sleeping in today
wake me up for lunch

ketchup vs. catsup

ketchup
catsup?
how ya doin'?
what's up?

i'm trying to choose the words that you'll best understand
trying to choose the words so that you'll like me better
and you can tell me all about your distant and exotic land of Idaho

nuclear
nuc-u-ler?
realtor
real-a-tor
i'm trying to say the words so you'll best understand
trying to say the words so that you'll like me better
and you can tell me all about your distant and exotic land of Idaho

kitty corner, catty corner, wash or warsh the clothes
scoop the snow or shovel snow or neither one of those
day-ta, data, neither, nye-ther
howdy-ho there, hey there, hi there
how do they come and go in Idaho?

bag of chips

on a journey for the word
searching for the meaning
a message not yet heard
the message i was needing

the man atop the hill
great knowledge in his head
with such poetic skill
this is what he said

a bargain bag of chips
is not a bargain bag of chips
if the chip tastes like shit
then no one will eat it
and then all that's left is a bargain bag of shit

the message was all too much
i was blind but now i see
and feeling so in touch
'twas my epiphany

now i am awake more than i've ever been
truer words never spake
so i'll tell you all again

a bargain bag of chips
is not a bargain bag of chips
if the chip tastes like shit then no one will eat it
and then all that's left is a bargain bag of
all that's left is a bargain bag of...
all that's left is a bargain bag of...poo

looking

walking down the street
i met a woman, she was sugar-coated sweet
she asked if i'd found Jesus
but i didn't know that he was missing
i suggested maybe he'd gone fishing
she looked at me confused
i said i hope you find him soon

walking down the street
i saw an old friend, it was years since i had seen
he asked if i was busy
he had some business to talk with me
a golden opportunity
i said i hope your pyramid scheme goes real well
but i'm looking for something else

she was looking for salvation
he was looking to get rich
i was mostly looking for a sandwich
nothing fancy
maybe turkey?
sliced tomato
hold the mayo

she was looking for salvation
he was looking to get rich
i was mostly looking for a sandwich
roasted chicken
finger lickin'
sliced tomato
hold the mayo